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I think it must be the case that the time leading up to the birth of your first child is always a significantly contemplative event. There is usually a lot of time to wonder about things to come and reflect on life so far. Plans are laid to address uncertainties. Contingencies are considered and one worries nonetheless. The most surprising thing for me concerning Evelina's birth and growth was how naturally she wove herself into our lives. I had expected a disruption.
The only disturbances I experienced were self initiated under the mistaken perception that I needed to change my life in some drastic way to accommodate my child. Certainly our lives did change because of Evelina. However the changes were a blossoming of dormant buds and vestigial organs finally given utility. To witness these previously hidden utilities spring forth was a wonderful surprise. Change has come gradually but unrelenting.
Necessarily, I assume the run-up to anyone's second born is comparatively distracted process. This was certainly my experience. Katka even expressed concern about my lack of enthusiasm about the news of her second pregnancy. Its true, for some reason I wasn't really pumped up about the news until I learned of my sister's pregnancy as well.
My sister Ashley, is six years younger than I and lives in Sweden with her Swedish husband. And there was a distinct possibility that we would never have families with kids anywhere close to the same age. So when I learned that Katka and my sister were expecting births within the same two weeks I was thrilled. My sister and I haven't ever really been that close but now I predict lots of fun times for our families in the future. I believe in a lot of ways kids help bring adults closer together.
I can already see how much better life will be for us now with Eliáš. Evelina not being the center of attention of everyone all the time is a very healthy turn of events. Of course, just as all my friends said, it is a hell of a lot more work for us parents and especially Katka but now the party rolls with us. Even as an infant Eliáš has given us a critical mass ensuring that never again shall a dull moment pass in our household.
It is especially apparent when we get physically close together. We really more clan-like now. I mean we've got depth, starting players and subs, full offensive and defensive lines, a women's team, a men's team and mixed doubles twice over. I imagine this is funny to hear for someone from a really large family but I'm trying to relate that sense of dynamism that is only just starting to play itself out in our home.
At the moment Eliáš is a pretty easy kid or maybe mommy is doing so much that I just think he is easy. He usually wakes up twice a night for milk but I wouldn't know unless I ask. EJ is also sleeping through the night. The logistics involved now with going out for the day are formidable. I'm taking charge of EJ for the most part and Katka prepares for any eventuality with Eliáš. I'm not quite sure how outings are going to work with me at school. We hope to figure out some kind of system before I disappear into work again.
I'm sure my absence will be partially filled by Katka's family. Both Bara and Vašek enjoy being with Evelina and Eliáš and show solid parents parenting skills. I look forward to see these relationships grow. In the end that it really what a second child gives you. The perfect excuse to really depend on the loved ones that surround you for support and growth. Managing this dependency will be challenge but that is what will make the family bonds that much stronger and functional.
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